SKILLS TRAINING. More than one parent must have thought that the ideal would be for children to come with an instruction manual under the arm or a child, his parents had read the manual blessed. That dream, let's face it, it will not happen, but there are other tools, we can go to real coaches who will help us have a better relationship with our relatives. These are not recipes ... the key is to learn to ask the questions necessary for each conflict. If you look at the English Royal Academy the word family, the following appears: "A group of people related to each other to live together." How simple it would be if the definition really is limited only to the short term. The issue is much more complex, especially considering that one does not choose many of the relatives to meet. Conflicts are an inevitable part of family life and learn to solve can be uphill task if it is not clear how. But fortunately, there is a coaching family.
widely spoken currently coaching in general. This method comes from the verb coach (train), and of directing, instructing and training a person to achieve a goal or develop a particular skill. Who needs the service is the 'coachee' guide and who is the 'coach'. This methodology is commonly associated with executive area, companies that want to enhance the capabilities of their employees. However, its success has been extrapolated to other areas much more intimate ...
"Coaching in the family can contribute to the acquisition of tools that will allow its members to interact optimally, achieving a full and satisfying family life for everyone," said Daniel Castro, neurolinguistic coach certified by the International Coaching Community.
Although there anyone who can teach us to be good fathers, sons or husbands, coaching is an excellent guide to identify those obstacles have a peaceful coexistence, or a better way to overcome situations that often painful experiences family group as a separation, for example.
"The coach's job family is focused on 'them', in the family. Delivery tools and lessons of cooperation, ways of solving problems and different ways of expressing love. The idea is to help people rediscover harmony , balance and love to build what they want get, "said Alida Talloni, center director NLP & Coaching Chile.
Coaches Parents who can not accept that their children may want to consider a nontraditional career, children who fail to cope with a divorce, couples who do not know communicate with their children and even young couples who want to identify the right time to have babies, of all goes to the office of a coach. "Our customers are looking for solutions, but what we do is that, based on questions, we induce that they respond. The questions become answers, and through them identify their motivations and how to achieve what they want in life. The idea is to break with the 'surface structure', "says Paul Anwandter, president of the Chilean Association of Coaching.
Felipe (48) could not accept that his eldest son would not study law, which traditionally run virtually their entire family wielded. fights, punishment and constant tension came after the controversial phrase 'parents, I want to study art. "PSU date approached, Felipe and his wife could not dissuade his son's decision was within weeks of take. In desperation and in an attempt to find someone outside the family to persuade him to enter his mind, went to an office of a friend are coaching recommended.
came looking for a specific solution: that his son to reconsider, and delegated to the coach this difficult mission. The first session was in shock, eyes begin to open. While the problem had realized that perhaps they were the wrong. Although at first the phone seemed confused Question increasingly, after several sessions the picture became clearer. "While trying to respond to your coach, you bring out our own mistakes. Sometimes someone needs to break the shell so that we realize what we are failing and how to remedy it," said Felipe. Finally, both parents understood that they wanted his son to be happy, and that this would not get just by being a successful lawyer, after coaching the conclusion was that happiness could be achieved through the art perfectly.
"The results of coaching are fast, because you work with specific problems. What we do with the questions is to connect the side of cognition, perception of the world, with the emotional side. In short, our task is to integrate reason and emotion, making the coachee discover things that are peculiar, as what you want for your family, for example, "explains Anwandter.
learn to be better
methodology is relative to every customer. You can do individual sessions, couple or the whole family group in an office, in a cafe or in the same house. Ideally, that does not involve a very long time, the average is two weeks, because the topics are specific and objective is to give people tools to be the ones who resolve their conflicts. "This is not therapy, therefore is to avoid prolonged dependence. We focus on a particular problem and work to resolve, once solved is finished coaching. A new conflict is another distinct process," says Paul Anwandter.
Experts agree that for a coach to be successful, it is essential customer commitment and proper preparation of his coach. The responsibility, the ability to recognize mistakes and willingness to change behaviors are essential to achieve results.
"Family Coaching is a growing trend that is effective in resolving issues with prompt and effective methodologies that cause changes in the personal views within the family unit," the coach Alida Talloni. Open the doors of family intimacy can be a difficult decision, but sometimes the only outsider is able to see what's so near blind.
Where?
www.coachingintegral.cl
Written by: Maria Paz Maldonado
Illustration: Nicholas Galdames
Source: Diario La Tercera, Woman Magazine, Issue No. 1489
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